Random Acts of Poetry: Insanity in 343 Words

I want to say that loving you was a waste of time

But I’ve never been a liar and

I don’t intend on becoming one now

Loving you showed me a side of myself that I

Didn’t know existed

But it also showed me that

The side you brought out of me

Belonged buried

There was a sense of shame in loving you

You took advantage of me

You took what was sweet inside of me

And turned it bitter

What was once warm, is now cold

What once loved company and light,

Now seeks the darkness and solitude

Don’t talk to me

Please talk to me

Maybe if I understood what is going on inside me

I could fix it

So that I can share my warmth with someone else

Loving you brought out the best in me

But you took that when you left

I don’t know how to replenish my stock

I have lost my sense of direction

I have lost my bearings

I have lost everything I knew to be mine

Everything that I knew to be me

Here I am

Empty, a shell of what used to be

You have me inside you, you’re just too fucking selfish to give it back

You’re not doing anything with it,

You just don’t want me to give it to anyone else

And you don’t want me

I’m not sure what hurts more

That I gave you everything

Or that you didn’t deserve it

I used to cry at the thought of you

Then I used to dream of murdering you

Then I cried again

I’m all cried out

Murder looks good to me now

Because, right at the moment of your death

I can suck in your last breath and get back what you stole from me

I gave it to you, but you stole it from me because you knew you were taking it under false pretenses

It is mine, I WILL have it

Or I will have you

Hand over your heart, or let me borrow your gun